What Hurts the Most
by efficacious humorosity
Summary: Set in Severus's seventh year. Lily and James get engaged. Snape reflects bitterly over the loss of his love. Please R & R! Rated for language, just to be safe.


**A/N: I don't own Harry Potter and I don't own "What Hurts the Most" by Rascal Flatts. The inspiration for this story struck me while I was feeding my dog just moments ago, so please enjoy. Don't forget to leave a review! **

"What Hurts the Most"

_I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house_

_That don't bother me_

_I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out_

_I'm not afraid to cry every once in a while_

_Even though going on with you gone still upsets me_

_There are days every now and again I pretend I'm ok_

_But that's not what gets me _

Severus Snape sighed, throwing the rag, which he had been using to attempt to clean his cauldron to the side unceremoniously. "Why do I bother?" he said aloud, despite the fact that he was quite alone. The Slytherin boys' seventh year dormitory was empty, except for him. He risked a glance at his nightstand, upon which stood a photograph of him and the girl who had once been his best friend: Lily Evans. Though he would never allow it if he had been in the presence of others, he felt his eyes well up and allow a few tears to fall from his cold, black eyes.

_What hurts the most_

_Was being so close_

_And having so much to say_

_And watching you walk away_

_And never knowing_

_What could have been_

_And not seeing that loving you_

_Is what I was tryin' to do_

As he continued to cry, he murderously cursed the day he had driven away his only true friend. "Damn it, why? Why the bloody hell did I have to call her a 'Mudblood'? It's all bloody Potter's fault! Damn him!"

He slammed a clenched fist into his pillow, throwing himself onto the mattress in a violent manner. He could've had her. She could've been his. _His_ girlfriend. _His_ love.

_It's hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go_

_But I'm doin' It_

_It's hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I'm alone_

_Still Harder_

_Getting up, getting dressed, livin' with this regret_

_But I know if I could do it over_

_I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart_

_That I left unspoken_

But now she was with _Potter_. "Damn him!" Snape snarled aloud, descending into the otherwise empty Slytherin common room. It seemed everyone had gone out of his or her way to avoid him. Did they know something he didn't? Laughing mirthlessly to himself, he supposed it wouldn't be surprising if Potter proposed to Lily. They were, after all, the so-called "King and Queen of Hogwarts." The Head Boy and Head Girl dating, imagine that. He supposed the shared living quarters made shagging much more private and convenient.

He bitterly pushed the thoughts out of his mind. It was painful enough to see the two of them together, he didn't need to think about it constantly as well. Unless, of course, he felt suicidal. But when didn't he? The girl, no, woman he loved had spurned him and ignored his existence and started dating the one boy she had claimed to hate! How much lower could he possibly sink?

_What hurts the most_

_Is being so close_

_And having so much to say_

_And watching you walk away_

_And never knowing_

_What could have been_

_And not seeing that loving you_

_Is what I was trying to do_

As he exited the Slytherin common room in an attempt to lose himself amidst the numerous twisting corridors of Hogwarts, he failed to notice the redhead who had been waiting surreptitiously behind a statue. Stalking off into the darkness of the castle, he muttered, "Stupid Mudblood bitch."

Lily had started to chase after him, to talk to him, but stopped short when she heard these words leave his mouth. She glanced down at the gleaming diamond ring resting on the ring finger of her left hand and sighed loudly, tying her red hair back into a ponytail. She had come to see Severus, in the hopes that they would be able to reconcile and at least be friends. Or acquaintances. She had wanted him to be happy for her and James. But she supposed civility towards her or James was past him at this point. When she thought about, she did, in all honestly, love Severus. But as a friend. Losing him in such a sudden and cruel way was what, in fact, hurt the most.

_What hurts the most_

_Is being so close_

_And having so much to say_

_And watching you walk away_

_And never knowing_

_What could have been_

_And not seeing that loving you_

_Is what I was trying to do_

_Not seeing that loving you_

_That's what I was trying to do_


End file.
